SHARK SANDWICH!
Let’s see a show of hands: Who hates Christmas music? That’s kind of what I thought. Let’s not get all upset! I don’t hate Christmas. I’m not declaring a WAR on Christmas or any of that nonsense. So just cool out for a second. What I can’t stand about the Christmas music you get bombarded with everywhere you go during this season is the notion that I will just instantly be transported into a happy trance like state of euphoria just by hearing a note perfect, crystal clear rendition of “Jingle Bells” sang by some American Idol reject. I’m an old school punk rocker, metal head, indie music lovin’, blues hound, esoteric, scuzzy rock n’ roll type of guy. So that homogenized, cute and safe B.S. isn’t going to cut it! I want to head bang to “Jingle Bells”! I want “Silent Night” to not be so silent! Do you feel me now? I want Christmas music to rock, be funky, get soulful, head bang, and possibly get in the mosh pit! So let’s get to the good stuff.
National Lampoon’s Radio Hour– “Rod Serling Explains the First Christmas”
The National Lampoon’s troop leads us off with hilarious take on Christmas.
National Lampoon’s Rod Serling Explains Christmas
Austrian Death Machine– “Jingle Bells”
Now this is what I’m talking about!
Loudon Wainwright III- “Suddenly It’s Christmas”
My sentiments exactly.
The Features- “Father Christmas”
Great song about waiting for Santa.
Material Issue- “Merry Christmas Will Do”
Early 90’s alternative band sings of relationship troubles in the joyous season.
Richard Cheese-“Do They Know It’s Christmas?”
Richard Cheese and his band Lounge Against The Machine cover the mid 80’s charity single to hilarious effect.
King Sun-D Moet- “Christmas In The City”
Some old school hip hop X-Mas tunage.
Judge Dread- “Christmas In Dreadland”
I don’t know much about Judge Dread. I’ve really only heard his Christmas tunes and know I love them. He really gives X-mas the bollocks.
Tom Waits– “Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis”
Tom Waits is a master at detailing the lives of the down trodden and desperate. So good.
Marcy Playground-“Keegan’s Christmas“
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Very underrated band from the 90’s.
Joseph Spence- “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town”
Joseph was a Bahamian Folk Guitarist and he had a special way around songs that included his characteristic vocalizations and humming.
Wall of Voodoo- “Shouldn’t Have Given Him A Gun For Christmas”
Classic early 8o’s new wave band sing about a Christmas present gone wrong in perfect Wall of Voodoo fashion.
Alien Sex Fiend- “Stuff The Turkey”
Alien Sex Fiend do their best to make Christmas goth!
Crucial Youth– “Santa Claus Is Coming (And Your On His List)”
Crucial Youth make an awesome hardcore anthem about how Santa is going to come and get you sucker!
GWAR- “Stripper Christmas Summer Weekend”
The title doesn’t make much sense but I’m not going to argue with GWAR, are you?
The Killers-“Don’t Shoot Me Santa”
The Killers finally meet heir match when St. Nick the lawman finally catches up to them for a high desert showdown or something like that.
Root Boy Slim & The Sex Change Band– “X-Mas at K-Mart”
The late Foster Mackenzie III, otherwise known as Root Boy Slim, really wants you to buy his record as long as you are shopping at K-mart.
Sum 41/Tenacious D-“Things I Want”
Sum 41 lays down a metal foundation for J.B. and Kage to tell Santa that they’ve been pretty bad but they still want some pretty choice stuff. I want a “laughing hyena with fire shooting out its but” too!
Eek-A-Mouse-“The Night Before Christmas”
What goes better with Christmas than a little reggae right? No, you don’t think so? Let legendary reggae band Eek-A-Moose change your mind about that.
Psychostick-“Jolly Old Sadist”
Very metal and humorous tune about how Santa is a real a-hole sometimes.
DEVO- “Merry Something To You“
DEVO is like the Shark Sandwich we don’t care what you worship or how you go about it. We wish you good tidings.
The Pogues-“Fairytale of New York”
It’s a hard luck tale of love and love lost from The Pogues that features the late Kirsty Macoll. Still a fantastic song after all these years.
Fear- “F*ck Christmas”
The band Fear give a very short sentimental take on their thoughts about Christmas. Front man Lee Ving is the real deal.
Hanoi Rocks-“Dead By Christmas”
Legendary and under appreciated rockers Hanoi Rocks serve up their dirty sleazy rock.
The Physics Of Santa
Learn the science behind St. Nick!
The Dwarves- “Drinking Up Christmas”
The mighty punk band The Dwarves carve up the place with this burning scorcher about Santa who’s apparently fallen off the wagon.
Fishbone- “Slick Nick, You Devil You”
Fishbone also tell us of a tale of Santa being kind of a dick.
Afroman-“Deck My Balls”
Admit it, you laughed.
Clockhammer-“Here Comes Santa Claus”
Clockhammer kills it on this version.
Clockhammer-“Here Comes Santa Claus”
Beasoleil- “Papa St. Nick”
Time to kick it out Cajun style from down in the bayou.
The Greedies-“A Merry Jingle”
Memebers of Thin Lizzy enlisted the help from a couple Sex Pistols and made this excellent Christmas tune. Long live Phil Lynott!
Asleep At The Wheel– “I Hate Christmas”
You think it’s going to be a real downer of a tune and then it turns into the most fantastic and bitter sweet tune ever. Ray Benson is the real deal, you should be a fan of this long standing band. Just go ahead and download this from wherever you get your music from, trust me.
Asleep At The Wheel- “I Hate Christmas”
Otis Redding- “White Christmas”
Otis takes us on a soulful ride through his classic tune. So good.
Venom- “Black X-Mas”
And Venom counters with a thrash uppercut!
Nerf Herder- “I Know What You’re Getting For Christmas”
Star Wars named band call out everybody this Christmas.
Nerf Herder- I Know What You’re Getting For Christmas”
Jim White- “Christmas Day”
Alt country crooner Jim White’s spacious off kilter ode to Christmas Day. Entrancing stuff.
The Arrogant Worms- “Santa’s Going To Kick Your Ass”
Santa’s coming and he’s not happy.
Oscar Woods & Black Ace- “Christmas Time Blues”
Some real old school blues.
The Fall- “Jingle Bell Rock”
Mark E. Smith and the band blow through this song in full on Fall style.
Peter And The Test Tube Babies-“I’m Getting Pissed For Christmas”
How many people will follow suit?
Prince- “Another Lonely Christmas”
The great purple one slow burns through a slinky groove.
Was (Not Was)-“Christmas Time In Motor City”
The massively underrated Was (Not Was) tell of X-Mas in their hometown.
The Celibate Rifles- “Merry X-Mas Blues”
Old school punk rock will never get old. These guys were from Australia!
AC/DC- “Mistress For Christmas”
Another Australian gem AC/DC can barely keep it in their pants.
Belle And Sebastian- “Santa Claus”
The Scottish band covers The Sonics song and surprisingly rocks it.
The Aggrovators– “Santa Claus Dub”
More evidence that Reggae rules supreme at Christmas time!
Brave Combo- “Santa’s Polka”
We’ve done rock, soul, punk, cajun, country, metal and now we visit some polka!
The Fleshtones- “Champagne of Christmas”
Perfectly rockin’ tune.
Lil’ Ed And The Blues Imperials-“I’m Your Santa”
A little blues fun for Christmas.
Wesley Willis-“Merry Christmas”
The late Wesley Willis will be sorely missed. “Rock over London, Rock On Chicago!” Forever man. Forever!
De La Soul- “Millie Pulled A Pistol On Santa”
De La Soul are right awesome. Nuff’ said.
Rev. J.M. Gates- “Death Might be Your Santa”
The good Reverend gives you a little hellfire and brimstone so that you keep it real this Christmas.
That should do for now. Be forewarned, I live for this type of thing. Come back often for Volume II coming soon! Also year end best of coming soon. And as always scoot on over to www.bandbook.com and sign up! See you real soon.
Bandbook Blog 